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I'm · gunna · make · a · change...

for once in my life.

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01:35 am
9/3/06

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Just a regular update.

Okay, So I am realizing that whenever I update its always about something depressing or just about me not being happy. Lately, and I don't know why, I have just been feeling like I am not good enough, and when I say not good enough I mean for anything or anyone. I don't know why or how I have friends or I'll want to know why the "good guys" don't like me and never will. I have just been in an extremely depressed state. I must say it is pretty annoying. I just wish that more things would go my way. I have been doing poorly in school as well. It seems like nothing can be right.

Honestly, I need someone to tell me... Is there something wrong with me? I'm usually not of those girls who says "I'm fat", but I will admit that I don't think I'm pretty. Its not that I think I'm ugly I just... don't know anything anymore. Right now I just wish things would change, and for the better. I guess that'll be it for tonight.

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07:44 pm
9/25/05

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Okay so lets start with Friday.
Friday: During school Friday I didn't really have much to do after school so during the day Nick (with the Mohawk) and I were like we are doing something after school. So Nick, Nick, Julio, Ben and I all walked to the bus stopped and headed toward the mall...except Nick (without the Mohawk) went home, he just had to walk in the same direction. Then Nick (with the Mohawk) and I got off the bus but Ben and Julio stayed on and went home. Nick and I hung out for a little bit. We ate some food walked around and talked. It sounds pretty boring but it really wasn't. He is a really cool kid and someone that I find my self able to open up with. Im happy that i decided to go. Then I went home and straighted up the house for company. It was my moms friends birthday and her husband was out of town. So they came over for dinner and then people came over after dinner, while they went out and we surprized her with them. It was pretty fun! Then I didn't go to bed until 4 in the morning I had so much energy!

Saturday: Woke up at 1:25 in the after noon! I didn't some homeowrk..not much. Then got ready for progressive dinner. It was so fun. I must admit i liked it better last year but it wasnt bad this year. then Gina slept over and we did a lot of homework. With is really unlike us because when we are together we usually don't get any homework done! Then she fell asleep and i was online doing some more homeowrk and chatting.

Sunday: I had to work this morning at 11...and NO people do not get ice cream that early...we need an hour to open the store. People are always asking that. So i worked until 4 and then went to borders with Megan and we were looking for a scene we didnt have much luck. Looks like we will be doing something from Steel Magnolias. Oh well it should be good. Then I did some more homework, ate and now i am typing. Overall i would say this weekend wasnt too shabby..

What sounds do ducks make Gina? Lol lova ya!
-Sam

Current Mood:	uhhh...
Current Music:	Micheal Jackson...Man in the Mirror

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10:22 pm
9/16/05

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YES and once again things are confusing...

Current Mood:	unsure
Current Music:	Fall out boys

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07:53 pm
9/14/05

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No 4 lol ughh just a good day! :)

Alright, So today was a pretty good day..its was a no 4 day...THAT MEANS NO READING!! HAHA that means itll be a good day right from the start! lol ok so lets see I have some new sayings...here is the list

WTF? Lol its really funny jsut to say..like not on the internet... its like new net-lang.
Go eat banana pancakes...its from a song and i be lovin it!
50% and one ova two...Gina and I now have nicknames for each other lol (i think its cool)

I guess thats it for "sayings" good times good times..
Oh i made up a new song for cold stone..it goes..

cold stone remake of get low
From the gea
to the stone to the stone
Would you like it in a waffle cone?
Any flavors we have
all cold stone ce cream
all ice cream we got we got
from the gea
to the stone to the stone...

what do you think?? have anythign i can write that is better? Let me get some comments!

I guess thats it..i am so happy i am outta my funk totally over that guy "David" LMAO im such a loser thanks for those of you who put up with it i love ya!!!

Current Mood:	excited
Current Music:	CoLd StOnE JiNgLeS

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09:05 pm
9/5/05

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I got tagged so read the instructions...
List ten songs that you are currently digging...it doesn't matter
what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're
no good but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post
these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your journal.
Then tag five other random people to see what they're listen to.

OK to warn those who might read I listen to pretty weird music...
1. Down With Disease
2. Waste
3. Man in the Mirror
4. Thriller
5. The Thunder Rolls
6. Calling Baton Rouge
7. Super Mario Brothers..lol its awesome!
8. The Mango Song
9. Marijuana
10. Live like you were Dying

Ok now that thats over I really don't have much to say..except I had a pretty wack dream the other night...The only thing is I don't know why it was so wack.. Anyways, I went to my sisters "house" today. I was doing a good job and being a big help my breaking the tile off of the floor and I found this awesome record player at the house so I took it home with me. On Wednesday Julio is going to come over and try to help me get it to work... hope it does! I have so many records that I would love to listen to! Umm but other then that other is really going on... But I'm pretty excited for school tomorrow! :)

Current Mood:	WOW normal isnt an option!
Current Music:	Man in the Mirror

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03:25 am
9/3/05

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Can't stop smiling!

Wow this is kind of strange. I wen from kind of depressed to happy. I went from forgetting about someone to thinking about someone.. and i went from never updating to three comments in one day. (kind of) Weird things are happening, but I think they are good.

*Goes to bed with a smile*

Current Mood:	Yay
Current Music:	The sound the keyboard makes when you type..

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11:25 pm
9/2/05

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Oh yes, I realized, after I posted that I have more to add. Drama Club is pretty good. Although there are no "Seniors" which makes it feel weird. I went to the first meeting, and to my surprize I didn't see the same people that introduced me to Drama as a freshmen. I was shocked. Although I knew they wouldn't be there it was like I expected them to be and when I didn't see them I realized for the first time that this year was going to be a very strange year.

Also Homecoming is coming up. Im not sure if I want to go or not... maybe if I have a date, which I probably won't, I'll go. So that basically means I'm not going to homecoming. Um.. sorry I forgot to put all this useless information in the update before, I'm sure i missed some stuff in here so I might update again. lol Sorry if I do and you become bored if you read!

Current Mood:	And still blank
Current Music:	Still none

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11:06 pm
9/2/05

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Ok well the whole thing with "David" is over. Im not really sure if I am interested in anybody right now. I feel like lately I have been wanting just a hook up, but I'm not sure if thats what I want at all. Have you ever liked anybody because they liked you? Is that normal? I wish I new what I wanted! Lately I just haven't been able to find my own little "Happy Place". Once I do I think I will be good for the rest of the year. I truely don't know how, but I put on a front for everyone. I can act like I am so happy. On the inside though I don't know what the hell I should do about ANYTHING! I really just need someone I trust, yes Gina I do trust you, but I think I need to talk to someone I don't talk to as much. Maybe they will see it in a different way then I do. I hate being so unsure about everything I do! If you are willing to listen to and help me just IM or call me or do something to let me know you are willing. Please don't say you are and then not want I really need somone! But now moving on...
I have just been informed that Taravella has lost a football game tonight 26 to 28. Wow! That is pretty close considering last year and every other year before hasn't been very good. We have already done good in the first two games. (That was the third one...haha)
What has been going on in everyone elses lives. I am very interested to know!
I guess thats it for now... I just want all of you to know I love you and thanks for being there for me. I dont think I tell you all enough. :) Love you!!! xoxo

Current Mood:	Very Blank
Current Music:	None

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11:21 pm
8/24/05

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Alright so havent udated in a while..be kinda in a slump lately, but i have been putting on a show for everyone..im pretty good at hiding how im feeling (this is a new discovery) so i need some advice...

i like this guy (lets call him "David")so i like "David" and im VERY USURE if "David" likes me..i dont think he does but it s possibility...anyways "David" has a girlfriend, and also likes this girl that lives out of town... still with me? if u r good job!... anywasy i REALLY like "David" and it just hurts to think he doesnt like me so i try giving myself false hope..so he likes a girl from out of town, he has a girlfriend and there is a pretty slim chance he likes me...what do i do?? if i didnt like him so much i would just give up but i just cant do that i like him way to much...it really sucks when u like someone and they dont like u...

If u have any advice i would really like someone to help me...and for those of u who no "David" use that as his name thanks!

Current Mood:	Hurt but pretending to be okay
Current Music:	cha cha slide

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10:49 pm
8/2/05

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Ugh in a slump and cant seem to get out

Ugh just not in a good mood...people r so upsetting!

Current Mood:	Oh w/e
Current Music:	the sound of Gina's voice

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04:23 pm
7/31/05

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Hey guys, I just got home today from a mini vacation with the family. It was pretty fun we went parasailing and on a mystery train ride..so fun!! um but now im back and in a weird mood.. u dont have to ask about it lol u probably dont wanna no. i guess thats it ill probably share more when im in a little bit of a better mood....

call if u wanna hang out...ill be in a better mood around people!

Current Mood:	i guess kind of annoyed
Current Music:	none

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12:23 am
7/19/05

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Awesome, so i got home from work about 50 mins ago and made awesome tips!!! Espically for a monday...14 bucks..alright it might not sound like alot but thats pretty damn good.. then paychecks came in TODAY!!! How sweet is that?!?!? lol..im probably gunna be the only one excited about that.. lol
tomorrow/today..is gunna be fun..laying on the couch watching a movie with my sister heck yes! that will be awesome!
umm oh yeah CALLING PEOPLE WHO CAN DO COOL LAYOUTS CALLING PEOPLE WHO CAN DO COOL LAYOUTS..
WANTED: SOMEONE WHO WILL DO A LAYOUT FOR..COMMENT ON THIS LIVEJOURNAL IF YOU ARE INTERESTED IN HELPPING SOMEONE WHO IS UNABLE TO PIMP OUT THERE OWN...poor child...HELP ME...:)) thanks!

love yall and comment!!!! please.

peace!

Current Mood:	Ready to fix all/any problems
Current Music:	sound that I hear when I type each letter...

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03:03 pm
7/18/05

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Alright well i guess its that time again..updating time. Well last night i went to the mall with Dana, Ben, Sam A., David, and Christina. It was pretty fun the movie was really good. Um its really funny. I saw Dana and Sam. I hadn't seen them in a while. I also went to the walk a few nights ago. (Im moving backwards..lol) I was with Caroline, Ben, Jack and Amanda. I talked to Caroline basically the whole time but it was fun! Um Ginas gone so ihave been hanging out with new people. This is a good experience but I still cant wait til Gina comes home. umm i guess thats it i cant wait til the 20th...PAYDAY!!!

Current Mood:	I cant describe it
Current Music:	Empty Spaces fill me up with holes

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04:14 pm
6/27/05

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Stuff thats going on in my life now?

Alright so its been a long time since i've written. I guess I have been busy... you no with all the friends I have..haha...

Anyways what better place to start then the last day of school. I went right to Gina's dads house in Tampa and hung out there for a few days. It was great!! Her dad took me for a ride on his motorcycle, I have to say that was a first. Then we saw sisterhood of the traveling pants. Not the best movie but it wasn't terrible. Then we traveled to Gainsville and stayed in a hotel for about 2 days while the rest of Gina's family went to Jeff's college to got his schdule. That was fun!!! then I arrived home on the 7th and was sick until the 23rd. How bad does that suck!!!! I know really bad.
Gina was still there while I was home so I worked alot to keep myself busy. I got some new stuff to wear so thats pretty cool. oh and I redecorated my room! Not to shabby.

I really dont have much to say nothing of any importance happens in my life....

OH WAIT.. Gina got..no no no MADE me a present while she was in Tampa...Its the coolest thing. It says friends know everything about you and still like you..lol ok well now thats it.

Peace out homes!

Current Mood:	Ready to clean my room..lol
Current Music:	Rascal Flatts- Mayberry

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09:53 pm
4/13/05

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Hey ya'll I haven't updated in a while. States was so fun!! I can't wait to get my pictures tomorrow...well nothing special is going on so thats it for now..bye bye

Current Mood:	Singing Mood
Current Music:	Avenue Q

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10:18 am
3/24/05

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hey people i guess i havent updated in a while...so here it is

Spring break is going pretty well, I went to the beach saturday and got sun burn and then went again on tuesday and now im going on friday..lol im SO smart! um.. i went to Coldstone and found a flavor i like!! i never like anything there so im excited..its called berry berry berry good but i call it berry berry berry berry good cos i think its berry good along with the name so i add one.. i no im such a loser..its all good though i dont mind. um..oh im so excited Gina comes home!! I'll have something to do now..

um.. yeah thats really all that happened...so far! haha
thats all i have to say except for...

Fall Out Boy - Grand Theft Autumn (Where Is Your Boy) Lyrics

Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentleman
Maybe he won't find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town

When I wake up
I'm willing to take my chances on the hope i forget that you hate him more than you notice I wrote this for you.
You need him. I could be him
I could be an accident but I'm still trying.
That's more than I can say for him.

Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentleman.
Maybe he won't find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town.

Someday I'll appreciate in value
Get off my ass and call you
But for the meantime I'll sport my brand new fashion
of waking up with my pants off at 4:00 in the afternoon.
You need him, I could be him
I could be an accicent but I'm still trying.
That's more than I can say for him.

Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentleman.
Maybe he won't find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town

Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentleman
Maybe he won't find out what I know, you were the last good thing about this part of time
(Repeat)

Maybe he won't find out what I know, you were the last good thing about this part of town

Current Mood:	hyper
Current Music:	Fall Out Boy

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10:38 pm
3/17/05

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Haha today was so fun...ok so after school i went with Gina and Jon to Miami Subs and then i went home hung out for a little went back for dinner and music night thingy it was so fun!! Micheal Focus did i will be ur hero baby and david was flapping his jacket so it would look windy...it was so funny..then Kacie, Danielle, Marissa and I went to Coldstone and met up with Gina. It was great ordering. I got to order from "Micheal F" and it was great then some kid put 1 coin in at a time and it was really funny..it was a good time plus Gina and I got some time to talk it was fun. Then Focus was on break and we talked to him for like 10 mins then left but it was soooo fun..tomorrow im going to Coldstone again!! i cant waits its gunna be so much fun..alright thats all for now!! TONIGHT WAS AWESOME!!!

later!

Current Mood:	weird
Current Music:	Coldstone songs..lol

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10:28 am
3/9/05

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Im so bored, so i went around other peoples lj and found this thing....take it!

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
29. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
33. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
34. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?

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10:04 am
3/9/05

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ughhh im sick... but i got to stay home for nrt's, if that is good or bad i dont really no but w/e...today is so boring so far. i have nothing to do. thats what sucks about staying home...um thats it for now!

Current Mood:	still sick
Current Music:	anything

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01:33 pm
3/8/05

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ugh i am sick and danielle is being a BITCH!!!

Current Mood:	sick
Current Music:	ugh i hate being sick

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